Miscellaneous Funny typos

[jbtsax]

I sent a pm to my teacher on facebook and wrote "sigh treading" instead of "sight reading". It may have been a Freudian slip because that describes how I sight read most days.

 

[Tenor Viol]

In my dim and distant youth, before I worked in IT and I worked in international banking and I used to do stuff related to import/export shipping documentation and payments, I was processing a letter we had received from a bank in west Africa. It was typed on airmail paper. Usually foreign letters were well-written, but this one was diabolical. At the end it concluded with: apilogies for the topping eros...

 

[ProfJames]

In my dim and distant youth, before I worked in IT and I worked in international banking and I used to do stuff related to import/export shipping documentation and payments, I was processing a letter we had received from a bank in west Africa. It was typed on airmail paper. Usually foreign letters were well-written, but this one was diabolical. At the end it concluded with: apilogies for the topping eros...

I think you could have been my bank manager at the time.....................

 

[jeremyjuicewah]

It isn't a typo, I know I know, but in the early 80s I used to get to Waterloo and take the Central Line out to Gants Hill. At the time Brook Street Bureau, the employment agency, used to advertise "Brook Street Bureau Got Big By Bothering" . They then started using a pic of a ventriloquists dummy saying "Gook Street Gureau Got Gig Gy Gothering". It only got really funny when I saw some wag had added the word "Gollocks" to the end of it.

 

[aldevis]

I think you could have been my bank manager at the time.....................

As an HMV store manager wrote once in an email (without trying to be funny):
"I am not asking to write War and Piece!"

 

[ProfJames]

What time are you at Dawkes tomorrow sir?

 

[aldevis]

What time are you at Dawkes tomorrow sir?

Are you off topic or Dawkes is actually a typo like "pruple" os "stoat"?
(I replied on the other thread)

 

[ProfJames]

Are you off topic or Dawkes is actually a typo like "pruple" os "stoat"?
(I replied on the other thread)

OK mate! Now I shall wait for you!!!

 

[Tenor Viol]

I think you could have been my bank manager at the time.....................

Worrying, as I was an import/export shipping documents / finance of international trade clerk in those days (fancy some export credit guarantees or perhaps an irrevocable documentary letter of credit? Maybe a triangular payment of USD to Hong Kong for you import business?).
These days, all I manage is a desk and a computer

 

[Bernie]

I'd been signing off emails with "Best Wishes" for a while then I decided to switch to "Regards", just for a change.

Next day I send an email to a customer. I'm a translator:

Dear Customer,

With reference to your request for a Dutch to English translation, I'm afraid I won't be able to help you as the document you enclose is written not in Dutch but in German.

Retards,

Bernie R​

 

[GiGi]

Not quite a typo but along similar lines... when I first arrived in London, I saw many a postcard stuck on phone boxes and such like advertising 'French lessons', and some 'German lessons', too. Looking for work and having qualified as a technical translator I thought that was a jolly good idea, I could give private tuition! So, I stuck a card up, too, with the phone number of my then landlady, who was none too pleased when she got some very strange phone calls asking for not exactly German lessons. I was told, possibly by Pete, I can't quite remember who it was, that I should have advertised 'German tuition'... it took me an age to understand.. 😳

 

[ProfJames]

Not quite a typo but along similar lines... when I first arrived in London, I saw many a postcard stuck on phone boxes and such like advertising 'French lessons', and some 'German lessons', too. Looking for work and having qualified as a technical translator I thought that was a jolly good idea, I could give private tuition! So, I stuck a card up, too, with the phone number of my then landlady, who was none to pleased when she got some very strange phone calls asking for not exactly German lessons. I was told, possibly by Pete, I can't quite remember who it was, that I should have advertised 'German tuition'... it took me an age to understand.. 😳

That has really made me laugh! Thank you!

 

[saxplorer]

Way back in the days of typing pools, I drafted some minutes of a meeting, and put it in the typing pool's in-tray. One of the action Items was "Pete and Jim will firm up this proposal."
Now my handwriting was and is diabolical and so it was not altogether a surprise to get back a typed draft reading:
"Pete and Jim will f... up this proposal."

 

[Tenor Viol]

Seems like a different era: I would scribble notes on shipping documents, put them in the typists' in trays and get back typed up documents, payment instructions and telexes for signing and authorising.

 

[trimmy]

Another not a typo but translation related !!

My Mrs as a ten year old was in the kitchen standing by the table clasping her hands, her dad came in and asked what she was doing ?
Mrs..praying
Dad...why ?
Mrs...to open the tin
He picks the tin up it says 'Pry to Open'
True story

 

[jeremyjuicewah]

Not quite a typo but along similar lines... when I first arrived in London, I saw many a postcard stuck on phone boxes and such like advertising 'French lessons', and some 'German lessons', too. Looking for work and having qualified as a technical translator I thought that was a jolly good idea, I could give private tuition! So, I stuck a card up, too, with the phone number of my then landlady, who was none too pleased when she got some very strange phone calls asking for not exactly German lessons. I was told, possibly by Pete, I can't quite remember who it was, that I should have advertised 'German tuition'... it took me an age to understand.. 😳

Ah, I thought for a minute we might have met.....but, never mind.

 

[jonf]

Way back in the days of typing pools, I drafted some minutes of a meeting, and put it in the typing pool's in-tray. One of the action Items was "Pete and Jim will firm up this proposal."
Now my handwriting was and is diabolical and so it was not altogether a surprise to get back a typed draft reading:
"Pete and Jim will f... up this proposal."

That brings back memories of working at the Charity Commission in the early nineties, just before computers became available in offices. I was dealing with some local charities in Northamptonshire, and I sent off a draft for typing regarding a charity in Stony Stratford. I also have awful handwriting, so I can't blame the typing pool, but there was one typist who was notoriously awful, who signed herself off as HK. This was her best ever, as the letter came back addressed to and with the subject matter, in bold, of 'Story Sh**twell'.

 

[aldevis]

but there was one typist who was notoriously awful, who signed herself off as HK. This was her best ever, as the letter came back addressed to and with the subject matter, in bold, of 'Story Sh**twell'.

She then invented predictive test.

 

[Targa]

That brings back memories of working at the Charity Commission in the early nineties, just before computers became available in offices. I was dealing with some local charities in Northamptonshire, and I sent off a draft for typing regarding a charity in Stony Stratford. I also have awful handwriting, so I can't blame the typing pool, but there was one typist who was notoriously awful, who signed herself off as HK. This was her best ever, as the letter came back addressed to and with the subject matter, in bold, of 'Story Sh**twell'.

If it had been for Stratford on Avon one of our members would have been worried.

 

[Tenor Viol]

Then there is Stone in Staffordshire