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Lost my mojo!

Taz

Taz

Busking Oracle
Messages
3,026
Location
Rugby UK
Since we went into lockdown, I have picked up my sax once! I played Somewhere over the rainbow for the NHS clap and then put it on it's stand. I just cant bring myself to play. No interest what so ever. I can't seem to find any inspiration in anything. I know I'm missing public performances as it's something I live for and that's got me very low but, as they are not going to happen anytime soon, what's the point? I find talking hard at the moment but this seems easier, somehow I can express myself, maybe it's the slight anonymity that helps I don't really know. I have been listening to your sound clips and enjoying them but struggle to comment as I would usually do, it makes me feel like I'm being a bit rude so I apologise for that, I still listen though as it's something that brings a bit of smile at a very dark time.
Keep the tunes coming, I'm sure I'll add one some day, maybe when the sun shines!
 
It is a bad time at the moment and more than a little difficult to keep positive. There are some gigs out there but it's not really the same as before - unless you play in a jazz band, in which case you're used to playing to 6 people who don't move from their table. ;) Although, playing behind a clear plastic wall is probably a new experience for everyone. It's obvious how it's supposed to protect the audience, not sure about the band, though.

I'm photographing a theatre gig in a couple of weeks (assuming it isn't cancelled in the mean time); I'm intrigued as to how many people will turn up (particularly as the audience will be of the older kind) and what a half empty theatre show is like. I'm hoping it will ignite a glimmer of hope for the future. I guess we'll see. I'm trying to be positive but if I'm honest, I'm not overly hopeful.
 
Taz said:
Since we went into lockdown, I have picked up my sax once! I played Somewhere over the rainbow for the NHS clap and then put it on it's stand. I just cant bring myself to play. No interest what so ever. I can't seem to find any inspiration in anything. I know I'm missing public performances as it's something I live for and that's got me very low but, as they are not going to happen anytime soon, what's the point? I find talking hard at the moment but this seems easier, somehow I can express myself, maybe it's the slight anonymity that helps I don't really know. I have been listening to your sound clips and enjoying them but struggle to comment as I would usually do, it makes me feel like I'm being a bit rude so I apologise for that, I still listen though as it's something that brings a bit of smile at a very dark time.
Keep the tunes coming, I'm sure I'll add one some day, maybe when the sun shines!
Click to expand...

That's not good at all.

In my own case, I have been finding the songs on the SOTM and the BOTM a real inspiration to get searching for good saxophone recordings that are new to me. And pretty much every month I have found some gems that have made me transcribe a solo or part of a solo, play along with the original, create a backing track and then record it.

It would be wonderful to hear your playing on the SOTM/BOTM threads when a tune grabs you and I hope it does. It's not like a public performance but it can be fun in a different way.

Rhys
 
Sorry to hear this Taz. Things are bad for sure. Like Wade I don't think you are looking for suggestions but if you are, let this place know. There may be stuff you can get involved in going on . Sessions and collaborations come to mind .
IMG_20201006_122031061.jpg
 
Sorry to hear that Taz. I don't think that it's uncommon though, and maybe knowing that is some sort of comfort. I very much fell out of love with playing in 2014 and it lasted about 4 years. For me it could have been as a result of a really enjoyable few years in music which waned along with friendships that were associated with those times.

Interestingly I began to listening to music more again and ultimately this got me back into playing, along with some "grass roots" gigs again with a local bunch of guys I really liked. Gigs in pubs with the punters two feet from the end of your sax. Real life. Seeing music from their perspective again.

I realised that my original criteria for loving playing hadn't changed and that most of my apathy was directed at the parts of music making that are more akin to a regular job. I think that listening could be the key though. Appreciation is where it all started again for me.
 
Good on you for sharing Taz, I reckon there's more than a few of us in the same boat. I've picked up the sax a few times (but that's it), but haven't played guitar once since lockdown - and I've always had to play guitar, every day. When we went away on holiday I'd get twitchy without the guitar, but now, nothing.

Odd, innit. I suppose partly it's the lack of gigs/rehearsals, partly it's not knowing what's coming up (so why learn a piece if I don't know when I'll be able to play it out).

I decided last week though to make more of an effort (and that's what it is...an effort) to play. I'm putting an hour a day aside to do music stuff. Doesn't matter what it is, but it has to be music stuff, so prepping the PC for recording, organising backing tracks, picking some new tunes to learn - I even ordered some cane reeds for a change ( have always used Legere).

By no means saying it will work for you, we're all different, but hopefully having a routine will help me, because doing it "when I feel like it" really hasn't worked.

Good luck bud, hope the mojo returns soon because you had lots of it :thumb:
 
Sorry to hear that Taz. What about busking? You did a lot of that a few years ago. I've got mates who go out busking in Stratford regularly (not with a sax though), and there's a sort of mass busk in Warwick on Saturday mornings that I took the tenor along to last week, if that's of any interest?
 
After my son flew the nest for college and my wife left me for her iPad I felt the same.
Throw open all doors and windows and play for the people you don’t know, who you’ll never meet except maybe when they let you know how much they’ve enjoyed your music, how uplifting it was for them in these sad times, or just the one person who really needed it. You’ll never know and I’m just an old fool but that’s why I play. And LOUD. Even if you live in the middle of nowhere, play with the ‘Birds and the Bees Orchestra’.
 
I wouldn't worry too much Taz : it's not possible to play for years on end without some kind of break . Mine was forced ; I had no choice but it did me the world of good in that I came back with renewed vigour and am really enjoying it again rather than " it's what I have to do "....
Chin up mate it will be fine !!;)
 
6441 said:
WHat kind of music will be played at the theatre gig and why are the people older types?
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It's a Tom Petty tribute band. To be honest, I'm amazed there are enough people in the UK who like him to make a tribute even possible. Given the artist and the venue, I don't expect many (if any) under 30s to be there, with the majority being around the 50 mark.
 
@Taz I'm really sorry to read how low you are feeling. I like @TimboSax suggestion of forcing it, often if I wait until I want to play it doesn't happen but if I commit to something I find when I start I enjoy it which makes coming back again easier.

If these feelings are spilling over into your everyday life too you should consider seeking help.

Keep talking about your feelings, you are not alone and it will pass.

Jx
 
Sadly Taz we are all in the same situation : no gigs ; studio ; teaching nada...
As much as it pains me to say it Christmas is just around the corner . Maybe an idea to focus on that and brush up on your set list for busking . It's good to have something constructive to aim for : practicing with no light at the end of the tunnel can be a little soul destroying...great playing but nobody to play it to...not good !!
Chin up matey... :)
 
I used the time to really get a handle on chord theory..It was a revalation as the the dim lights in my knowledge got brighter and brighter.Still miss playing in our trio but I will be back as a better player and surprisingly with even more enthusiasm... Regards
 
It been a bloody awful year on pretty much every front. I’ve only kept going on the music front by buddying up with a bass player friend of mine and setting ourselves recording projects. Swapped gigging for home studio tinkering just to keep everything moving, I’m going to come out of this with considerably improved production and engineering skills if nothing else..

Did have a few weeks of very intensive tenor practice at the beginning but pretty much burned out on that after a while…
 
Well, you know, 'it's a bad time at the moment'.....in one way...the way most people are completely fixated on (easy to do). However, within ourselves, and pretty easy to access, is the power to realize that, in fact, it is not a bad time at the moment.

My 'advice' (not that you were looking for any) would be:

...rather than stay stuck in a mobius-strip cycle of being down, then thinking about why you cannot motivate yourself- that focus on your lack of motivation then reinforcing your state of being down....

...rather than trying to 'find' things to keep yourself occupied - then getting down when either you cannot motivate yourself to finding 'things', or, finding those things but then being disappointed that (in fact) nope, they ain't doing the trick....

you can take this time period as a unique opportunity to start paying attention to the thing most of us humans hardly ever pay attention to: that is, just living in the moment. IMHO most of our angst comes from not what is going on in the moment, but rather stems from our thoughts of either what has happened in the past, or what we fabricate may happen in the future (and our fabrications are almost always worse than what actually does happen once the future becomes the present).

To do this is quite easy, actually...no hard immersion in any particular philosophy, theology, whatever, is necessary.

Just find some simple exercises to quiet the mind. This is literally as easy to do as flicking on the netflix series which someone recommended to you. And it helps way more, since at best the former provides some ephemeral distraction, while the latter is much more resonant.

Sorry if I seem proselytizing, not my intent.
 
You mention lacking inspiration but creativity and inspiration are not essential to each other. If you only play, or paint or write or whatever you waste too much time waiting for it to strike. Inspiration comes from doing, just work away at something and then you might start finding that inspiration is just waiting to be let in. When I was at art school there was a student who would just sit around waiting for inspiration, his own words, the tutors would tear him off a strip. Inspiration doesn’t just come along, you’ve got to work to make it appear.

Get your horn out, play it, even if, especially if, you’re just going through the motions. Do some exercises, at least you can work on your technique, mess about with what you’ve been doing and let things happen. I try to welcome the days when all I can do is play cliches because on those days I just apply myself to boring old exercises. Sometimes I surprise myself and find the fog clearing but at worst I know I’ll play better tomorrow.

Sorry if I’ve misread what you are saying but to me it’s a fact that if I just wait around for something to happen I won’t do anything and nothing will happen. We all have times like this, push back.
 

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