Advice needed please.

old git

Tremendous Bore
Ladies and Gentlemen,
As you are well aware, I am membership secretary of The Croydon and Sarf Lundun Massive and as such have received an application to be enrolled by one, Eric Pode of Croydon. I have insufficient information to judge whether he is a suitable person to join our esteemed company. He claims to own a saxophone, a Bur Kiss, a make and model of which we have no knowledge. Normally, we insist on a minimum four year 'Performance' course at one of the university colleges, having been grossly misled by a J. Peasmould Gruntfuttock. We have regretted his membership ever since, although he is our best sopranino player and needless to say, our only sopranino player.
If you have any information or advice regarding Mr. Pode, please post here, unless so scurrilous that it might get the board closed down, in which case, please pm me.
Thanking you in advance for all the information and advice you can impart.


Surely you mean Erica Pode who, after leaving the Navy, appeared several times in the late forties at what was once the Davis Theatre. Her act then involved standing on one leg and doing some very strange things with a flute. I read that she went down very well! If its the same person 'tis easily proven ... he/she has a tattoo reading 'SWELPMEGOD' on the left shoulder. Bet its the same person. I've had a hunt round YouTube as I believe he/she still does some TV work (in more ways than one!) but couldn't find anything. By the way, a 'Beurkees' is a Patagonian nose harp, the left nostril variety, not a saxophone at all ... I think she's having you on with that one!
I remain (etc.) ...

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